Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Coming apart a bit

Last week, I seemed to have a vendetta against my hands. I slammed my thumb in a dresser drawer. I touched a wood-burning tool and gave myself a nasty burn. I broke just about every nail on both hands by consistently and repeatedly ramming my hands into things dropping things and generally being clumsy.

At the same time, I've been accident prone and forgetful. There's the drawer and burn incidents cited above. I dropped Pukka's laptop and broke it. We drove to another state for a concert and I left the tickets at home.

For the record, I do not believe in some Greater Being who does bad things to me (or allows them to be done) so that I might learn some kind of lesson. However, I do believe that a pattern of accidents or illness in my life generally indicates some kind of underlying imbalance. If I can spot that problem and fix it, I can save myself some pain, and what's not to like about that?

So what's my problem now? Exactly what I'd like to know. Generally, when I've had a string of these things, I can sit down and think about them for awhile and evenutally an answer comes to me. Usually, there's a kind of "ah-ha" recognition to the right answer, but this time such recognition is just not coming.

First we have my hands. To me, hands mean work. Ok, so something's out of whack at work. The problem with this answer is that it's akin to noting that the sky is blue. I don't want to go into the details here, but I am so well aware that my job is fucked up right now that it's not even funny. I don't need to lose a digit to clue me in. Not to mention that the situation has actually been looking up since this little rash of injuries started.

Ok, fine, so let's try the accident/CRS angle. I have this come up a lot. Pat answer here is that I'm not being present. It's pretty easy to hurt yourslef when you're not inhabiting your space. But again, this answer just doesn't feel right.

So I'm left without much of a clue as to what's going on. I'd hoped that if I let this sit in the back of my mind for a day or two that I might come up with something, but so far, no dice. The good news is that, at least for the last couple of days, I've seemed to achieve a minimal/normal level of injury. So maybe whatever it is has worked itself out, at least until it comes up again.